Chapter 18

Rachel walked out of the barn after having greeted Jimmy and Charlie.  She'd given him a big hug upon seeing him in the yard and was grateful when he returned the sentiment.  She didn't care the reason for Jimmy's return, she was just glad he'd come back on his own.  He was the one who had walked away; she knew Kid wouldn't go chasing him so Jimmy had to be the one to make the first move.  Whatever had happened between him and Kid couldn't be worked out if they were in two different towns.  She hadn't asked what he was doing back and she wouldn't; he was a grown man and would figure out what he wanted or needed on his own.  And if he couldn't and needed help, well, that was what she and Teaspoon were there for but only if they were asked to lend a hand or an ear.

He did tell her he was passing through town on business and that he needed to talk to Kid and Buck about something.  She was still pondering on what he'd meant by that when she heard a buckboard approaching.  She noticed Louise riding in to the yard alone and went to meet her.

"Don't tell me he let you drive that thing all by yourself?"  she teased.  Rachel clearly remembered the argument between Kid and Lou just after breakfast; Kid and Buck wanted to pick up a few things in town that they would need to work on the house and Lou wanted to go out there on her own to get started cleaning.  Kid didn't want her driving the buckboard alone and wanted her to wait for him.  But if there was one thing Kid had learned from the year and a half he spent living and working with Lou McCloud, it was that he was very rarely, if ever, going to win an argument with the headstrong woman.  The outcome was that she could take the buckboard out alone, as long as she promised to go as slow as she could.  Lou had finally relented, just to get him off her back.

"He knows better than to mess with me,"  Lou reminded the older woman, smiling broadly that she had won the argument.  She reached behind her seat and took out a picnic basket, handing it to Rachel.  "The kitchen's all clean now so I'll be buying food and supplies tomorrow to take out with me."

"I got a box of plates and pots together for you to take over.  Since there's less of us here now, it was easy to sort through what I had,"  Rachel told her.

"I appreciate it, Rachel.  We made a list of items we'll need to live there - it's amazing the things you take for granted until you realize you don't have them."

Rachel's answer fell on deaf ears as Lou noticed a strange man coming out of the barn.  "Who's that?"  Lou asked as she pointed toward the barn, interrupting the woman.

Rachel followed her finger, seeing Charlie.  "We got company.  He and his companion will be staying for dinner."  She paused as the 'companion' came out of the barn.  She heard a gasp from Louise.  "Speaking of which, I better start bringing things over to the bunkhouse." 

By now, Jimmy had noticed the two women; Rachel decided she would give the two former riders some privacy.  She left the buckboard, calling to Charlie to follow her into the bunkhouse.

Jimmy hadn't heard the buckboard approach, thanks mainly to Charlie's jabbering.  The younger man reminded him of Cody more and more every day.  He stopped short upon noticing the woman sitting on the bench.  Even from this distance, she was more beautiful than ever.  Marriage sure seemed to agree with her, he thought.  He noted sadly that aside from when all the riders went after Pierson's gang, he hadn't been around her after the wedding.  She and Kid honeymooned for a week at the hotel in town and a couple days after they got back to the station, Jimmy had packed up all his belongings and left with Rosemary.

His eyes locked onto Lou's.  He stood there, just outside the barn, staring at the woman he'd once had more than a friendly feeling toward.  Upon seeing Rachel walk away, he realized she was trying to give them some privacy.  He took a deep breath, then swinging his saddlebag over his shoulder he made his way toward the young woman.

Coming toward her was the last person she expected to see at the way station.  He'd made it clear he was moving on with his life, a life that didn't include them, when he left without so much as a decent goodbye.  He'd come back for the rest of his belongings shortly afterward and all he managed to get out was a hasty 'I'll see you around'.  Now here he was.  Suddenly Lou got very nervous, wondering how the Kid would react to seeing Jimmy again; the two parted on bad terms.  They were both at fault but she didn't imagine anyone admitting it in the near future.

"Jimmy,"  Lou said as he came close to the buckboard.  "What are you doing here?"  She cringed;  she hadn't meant for that to come out as harshly as it did but she didn't want things to go back to the way they were the week after her wedding.  The arguments and accusations had been hard on everyone.

Jimmy froze in place, hearing the hardness in her voice.  He deserved it but it still hurt.  "Nice to see you, too, Lou."  He couldn't keep from sound upset.  They were so close at one time, he was her confidant and now, now, she sounded like she didn't want to talk to him at all.

"Sorry,"  she apologized, feeling guilty.  It was just hard for her, she was stuck in the middle; Kid was her husband and yet, she hated losing Jimmy as a friend.  "I didn't mean for it to come out that way, it's just that, well, I just ain't in the mood to break up any arguin' right now."

Jimmy walked closer to the buckboard, stopping next to the seat, and looked up at her.  "I didn't come here to fight with him, Lou.  As far as I'm concerned, that's behind us and I want it to remain that way."

"I like the sound of that."

The two friends faced an awkward few moments of silence, each wondering who would make the next move.  Finally, Jimmy couldn't take it any more.

"You look wonderful, Lou.  How have you been?"  Jimmy knew he sounded like he was talking to an old acquaintance, not someone he considered family.

"Fine, I'm real happy,"  she answered, feeling strange about the conversation.  "So, how's the new job?"  She knew it was a dumb question but it was easier than finding out the real reason he was there.

Jimmy shrugged.  "Not much different than all the times Teaspoon pinned a badge on us and we went after the bad guys.  The only difference is who I'm riding with."

She nodded then looked at him as he glanced away.  This was Jimmy, their Jimmy, not some stranger she hadn't seen in years.  "What are we doing?"  she asked, causing him to catch her eye.

"Talking."

"No, what we're doing is wasting time.  We've know each other too long and been through too much together that I think we can dispense with the formalities, don't you?"

The scrunched up look on her face had Jimmy chuckling in no time.  "You always did know how to set things straight.  No beating around the bush with you around."  He paused and took a breath before extending his arm toward her.  "Would it be alright now to offer the lady a hand?"

She smiled and accepted the outstretched hand.  "It's better than alright."  He lifted her to the ground then she wrapped her arms around his neck.  "I missed you, Jimmy ... a lot."

"I missed you, too, Lou."  He returned the hug then let go to look at her.

"Only me?"  she asked, staring at him.

Jimmy looked away uneasily;  Lou had this way of making him feel very human.  She could read him sometimes better than he could read himself.  He found his eyes riveted to the bunkhouse that he'd considered home and it caused him to think of all the people who had occupied it.  They had been considered family by him right from the start so why did things have to change?

He turned back to her.  "No, not just you,"  he admitted.  "I miss bein' here, bein' with my family, all of them."

"And all of your family misses having you around."

"All?"  he questioned skeptically.

"Yes, all,"  she told him, smiling,  "but you might have to be the judge of it yourself where Kid is concerned.  You both overreacted like usual and went too far with what you were saying and you both know it.  So how you handle seeing each other again, well, that's between the two of you."

"It concerns you, too.  You're his wife."  Jimmy needed to apologize to both of them - even though he'd directed his anger at the Kid, he'd said some pretty nasty things concerning Lou.  He just wanted to let her know that he only had the highest respect for her and nothing less.  As for Kid, Jimmy had let his pride dictate his actions.  If he'd only stopped to at least listen to what Kid had said, even if he didn't approve of it at the time, maybe he would have thought through what he was planning on doing and would have realized his leaving with Rosemary was done for all the wrong reasons.  He finally came to the conclusion that he'd let Kid push him out of their lives because he couldn't admit that Kid might have a point concerning Jimmy's relationship with Rosemary. 

"And you're his best friend ... at least you were."

"All I want is the chance,"  Jimmy told her.  He was afraid he might need her help to get Kid to listen to her.

"Don't talk to me, talk to him."

"If he'll let me."

"Oh, he'll let you, that's one thing he's learned from all this and hopefully you did too,"  she said sternly.  "From what I recall there was a lot of talkin' goin' on and no listenin' from either of you.  Kid may have been out of line more than once but he only did it out of concern for you.  He wasn't trying to hurt you; can you say the same?  You know, Jimmy, despite what you may think, we weren't tryin' to gang up on you and find fault in what you wanted.  It was just the person you wanted it with that bothered us.  I'm sorry if you thought otherwise."  She looked away sadly, thinking of the friendships that had been tested ever since.  "Forgive us for carin' but we do."

"Don't you mean did?"

"No, I mean do.  You're family and it hasn't been the same around here with you gone.  Jimmy, Kid never told me what your last argument was about but it upset him somethin' fierce.  I think he's still holdin' a grudge.  All I'm sayin' is that he'll listen to what you have to say - can't guarantee what he'll do afterward,"  she said with a slight laugh.  Jimmy knew better than anyone how short Kid's fuse was, since he was the recipient of more than his share of punches from the southern rider.  "But, Jimmy, there's one thing you need to know - I may love you but I'm the Kid's wife."

He nodded slowly, understanding.  He heard so much love in her declaration to stand by her husband, no matter what.  He admired the love they shared.

"Well, I best get to helping Rachel set the food out."  Lou started toward the bunkhouse, only to be stopped by Jimmy calling after her.

"Lou!"  He paused as she turned around.  "I just wanted to say that I'm glad things are going good for the two of you.  I mean it."

"Thanks, Jimmy.  It means a lot to hear you say that."  She gave him a small smile then went up the steps to their old sleeping quarters.