For Better Or For Worse
a story by Dana
© Dana 2000
Chapter 1
Lou sat up and looked out the window of Rachel's house to the now near-desolate Rock Creek waystation. Prior her and Kid's wedding a few weeks before, it had been a bustling place, filled with the commotion of all the riders, Teaspoon, Jesse, and Rachel. Now Jesse had run off with his outlaw brother, Frank, Cody had joined up with the army, Jimmy was probably off with Rosemary and the abolitionists, Noah was dead, Louise couldn't ride anymore, and her replacement had been murdered. Buck and Kid were taking all the remaining mail runs and were dog-tired themselves. Lou felt guilty that she wasn't able to help out, but she knew Kid would never allow it, besides the fact the Russell, Majors, and Waddell hadn't been too thrilled when they'd found out she was a girl. They'd even considered making her pay them back all the wages she'd earned as a Pony Express rider, but after a lot of arguing, Teaspoon had finally convinced them otherwise.
Louise dressed, made the bed and headed downstairs to find Rachel. Lou noticed that Rachel had left her a plate of breakfast on the table, but Lou didn't feel much like eating. She went outside and found Rachel hanging laundry.
"Hey, sleepyhead," Rachel commented once she noticed Lou.
"Sorry," Louise said sheepishly.
"Hey, that's okay," said Rachel. "You need your rest."
"Why?" Lou questioned, suddenly feeling frustrated. "I'm not doing a darn thing around here, I feel worthless and all I ever want to do is sleep!"
"Louise," Rachel said softly, "You've been through a lot in the past month. It's no wonder you're feelin' down. It happens to everybody."
"It's not happenin'' to you," Lou said, irritated, "And you've been through just as much as I have!"
"I didn't get married, Louise. That's a big adjustment. And I'm not worryin' myself sick wonderin' if my husband's goin' off to fight a war."
"Yeah," Lou said quietly. "But it's more than that." Changing the subject, she asked, "Does Cassie know yet?" referring to Noah's death.
Following a tragic incident with an army soldier, Cassie and her younger brother, Quinn, had moved on to Lone Tree, where there was a larger community of free blacks and there wasn't as much war talk. She'd taken a job in one of the restaurants, which was much easier for her than doing laundry all day. Unknown to most of the other riders, once the Pony Express officially disbanded Noah had planned to move there, too, and marry her. Lou couldn't imagine the poor girl's despair at losing the man she loved.
"Buck stopped off on his last run and told her," said Rachel. "It didn't sound like she's gonna take us up on our invitation." Rachel had offered Cassie and Quinn a place to stay in Rock Creek, but Cassie decided Lone Tree was home and Rock Creek wasn't a good place to raise a young, impressionable boy, especially without Noah's guiding influence.
Changing the subject, Rachel asked, "You eat breakfast? I left you a plate."
"Thanks, I saw it," said Lou. "I just ain't hungry."
"Louise, you're gonna shrivel up to nothin' if you don't start eatin'," Rachel chided.
"Geez," Lou snapped, "Between you and Kid, I'll die from naggin' before I shrivel up! 'Scuse me, but I think I'm gonna take a walk."
As she walked off, Louise regretted she'd spoken harshly to her friend. She knew Rachel was only trying to help, and she'd hit the nail on the head when she mentioned Kid and the war. Lou was giving him his space, knowing it was a terribly difficult decision for him to make, whether to fight for the South or not. Yet she couldn't keep going on not knowing...she was going crazy. Plus, she wanted to bring Jeremiah and Theresa up from St. Jo, but there was no point in doing that if Kid was going to leave, and if he didn't, they'd have to find a place of their own first because there certainly wasn't enough room in Rachel's house for all of them. Lou wouldn't have her flesh and blood sleeping in the bunkhouse like hired hands, especially since the roof had a gaping hole in it that was still being repaired.
The bright sun, light breeze, and fresh air seemed to help lift Lou's
spirits, and she found herself heading towards the knoll where they'd
held Ike's funeral. His death had started the downward spiral of the riders'
little world, from which Lou feared they'd never recover. So deep in thought,
she tripped on her skirts, still not quite used to wearing them outside
of town on the rough terrain. She fell down, but caught herself on
her hands and knees. Damn thing, she thought. Good thing the boys weren't
around or she'd never hear the end of it...but then immediately she wished
they were. She missed the kidding and the ribbing they'd given each other
and the laughter and tears they'd shared. They were the functional family
she'd never had, as haphazard as they all appeared to the outside world.
As she got up, she noticed a horse and buckboard at Ike's funeral site. That's odd, Lou thought. I wonder who that could be? As she got closer, she could tell that the visitor was a women. Louise could tell the women was deep in thought and wasn't aware of her presence. Lou approached tentatively, not knowing how to announce herself. She cleared her throat and softly said, "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to interrupt, I just came to be near my friend."
The woman turned around and lifted her head. Lou was shocked to realize the woman was Emily Metcalfe, the woman Ike died saving. Emily had disappeared shortly after Ike's funeral and hadn't been heard from in months. Her hair was much longer, and she was obviously pregnant. Louise could tell she'd been crying, and Emily quickly tried to wipe away her tears before Lou could notice.
"Lou?" Emily said, looking confused. "Is that you?"
"Yep, it's me. I guess the dress sort of threw you off," Lou replied. "It's so good to see you! Where have you been?"
"Well, I didn't figure Rock Creek was the most understanding place for a unmarried mother," Emily shyly smiled, and Lou knew she was referring to how the townspeople had treated Ike and Buck. Lou knew Emily was right...Rock Creek didn't have much tolerance for anyone "different."
"So why're you here?" asked Lou.
Emily started to cry again, this time not trying to hide her tears. Louise went to her and took Emily in her arms. "I just had to be near him," Emily cried. "Especially now with the baby comin'. Lou, you have now idea how hard it's been! And I thought I was a strong, independent woman. I guess the joke's on me."
Lou stepped back and looked Emily straight in the eye. "Emily, you ARE a strong, independent woman. You know when to ask for help, and that takes a lot of courage. You're with family now. We'll take care of you, just like Ike would want us to."
Emily smiled through her tears. "Lou, I really appreciate it, but the boys..."
Lou cut her off. "There's only two of them now, and one of them will have to deal with me if he treats you bad in ANY way!"
Emily looked at Louise quizzically. "What do you mean two? What happened to everyone?"
Eyeing the buckboard, Lou nodded towards it. "Why don't I explain everything on the way back to the station."
We've finally stopped losing family, Lou smiled to herself as she climbed into the buckboard for the drive back. This is a good sign.
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