DIFFERENT WORLDS

C.C.

~CHAPTER 7~

It was shopping day for Rachel and the boys, Ike drove the buckboard carrying Rachel, while Kid, Jimmy and Noah followed on their horses. Kid was going to try to find Hannah when he got to town, he was inwardly hoping not to see Louise, he had decided that maybe he
should stop giving her lessons, maybe courting Hannah and not seeing Louise would be the cure to his feelings for her.

But he knew she’d be hurt. He couldn’t tell her the truth, that was out of the question. He’d tell her but he hoped it wasn’t today, he wasn’t ready for that yet. He didn’t really want to hurt her, but he didn’t know any other way. He realized putting it off wasn’t right, but for now it was easier.

After picking up the supplies, Rachel set the boys free for a little while. She knew the church dance was Saturday and they wanted to find dates.

She laughed at them, seeking their prey, she thought as she watched them all meander away.

Kid’s wish to not see Louise today however was not granted. As he turned the corner he almost ran she and Stephen over. “Oh excuse me Lou” he stated surprised.

“It’s okay Kid, how are you” she questioned nervously looking at Stephen.

Stephen way eyeing Kid suspiciously, he didn’t realized Louise and Kid were friendly.

“Fine thanks, Sorry but I was in a hurry”, he hurriedly addressed her on continued on his earlier path without so much as a goodbye or indicating that he even noticed Stephen.

“What did he call you Louise?” Stephen spoke harshly to her.

She hadn’t noticed it, Kid almost always called her Lou now, how could she explain that.

“Did he call you ‘Lou’? again speaking harshly.

“Uh well” she fumbled for an excuse “I didn’t notice....he was in a hurry, probably easier than taking the time to say my whole name - you know people out here.... very informal.”

She knew she sounded like an idiot, she prayed silently that he wouldn’t press the issue.

Her prayers were answered; however he made a mental note to watch the two more closely. He knew Louise didn’t love him, but he would be sure that she did marry him. Hell he didn’t love her either, but her daddy had left her all that money that she would inherit when she turned 18. He’d marry her before that, then when he got her money, he didn’t care what she did. She was much to independent for him, he’d prefer a women with much less of her own mind.

“Got to get back to work” he quickly kissed her on the cheek and left her standing alone.

She hated the way she felt right now, irritated at Stephen, hurt that Kid had barely given her the time of day.

What did you expect Louise, she thought than fondly remembered he had absently called her by the nickname he had given her, no one else called her that and it warmed her heart when he did.

She was beginning to walk back toward the hotel when she noticed Kid standing in the street talking to a rather pretty girl. The girl was laughing and Kid was smiling at her. Damn, she thought, I know what that smile can do, that girl sure is lucky.

“Well Hannah, I was looking for you to ask if you would like to come to the church dance with me Saturday night, he asked after the formalities were complete.

“Oh I’d love to Kid, thank you” she looked shyly at him.

“Great” he grinned “pick you up around 6 o’clock then?”

“That’ll be fine, I’ll look forward to seeing you then” she was peering over his shoulder at Louise who was approaching the two.

He turned to follow Hannah’s eyes and groaned. Damn I don’t want to do this now, he thought.

Louise felt a little uncomfortable but she wasn’t about to let him get away with the way he treated her earlier.

“Hello again Kid,” she looked at Hannah. “I’m Louise McCloud” she offered her hand for Hannah. “Oh, I’m Hannah” she took Louise’s outstretched hand, “nice to meet you Louise .... ah Kid I’ve got to go... turning back to him “mama’s expecting me. I’ll see you Saturday, and I’m looking forward to it” she smiled and walked away from the two left standing in the street.

“What’s Saturday” Louise questioned him.

“Oh just the church dance” he replied flatly. Trying to figure a way to leave before she brought up lessons.

“Oh, a dance” she replied dreamily. “I haven’t been to a dance in ages” her eyes taking on a far away look, imagining the music, the finery....

Kid had to laugh at her, “Don’t think this is what you’re used to” he commented. “Probably the fanciest thing you’ll see at this dance is Teaspoon with a tie!” he chucked. “I’m sure it’s not up to your standards” sarcasm evident in his tone.

He didn’t know why he said it, it was mean. Maybe subconsciously he thought if he made her mad at him it would make thing easier.

Louise was obviously hurt by his accusation, he knew her well enough to know that she didn’t put on airs, but she wouldn’t let him know he’d hurt her.

“Wonder why Stephen hadn’t mentioned it?” she spoke mostly to herself, ignoring Kid’s earlier comment. “I can’t wait,” she finished.

“Well I guess I’ll probably see you there then,” he turned to leave.

“Wait Kid” she grabbed his arm to stop him. “When do we ride again?” she asked innocently.

He signed heavily, realizing he was gonna have to tell her.

“Well Lou... I mean Louise, you know I’ve been thinkin - you’ve pretty much learned everything I can teach ya’, he searched her face to see if had hurt her. But she didn’t reveal any emotions.

“Come on Kid, you know I’ve got a lot to learn, I haven’t even been up to a full gallop yet. And it’s really you telling Katy how to treat me, not me telling her what to do” she waited for an explanation.

Kid looked at the ground and kicked the dirt. “Maybe someone else can teach you.... Jimmy’s a better rider than me, see if he’d not mind taking over, I’ll ask ‘em if you’d like.”

She knew he was lying, out of all the riders Kid was the best, he had a way with horses and she knew it.

“What are you talking about Kid, what’s wrong?” she pleaded with him for the truth.

“I’m just busy right now” he lied.

She didn’t understand what he was doing, had she done something to offend him. She was not giving in that easily.

“What’s the matter Kid, are you mad at me?” she questioned, the hurt now evident in her eyes.

What should he say, how did he explain this..... <No Lou I’m not mad at you, in fact all I think about is putting my arms around you, running my fingers through your incredible hair, kissing you..... But your promised to Stephen, I can never do any of that, and that it’s easier to have you hate me than to be your friend, I can’t be just your friend. I want more - more that you can give. Come on Kid - come up with something>, his mind working, trying to come up with a reasonable excuse.

“No Lou, I’m not mad” he sighed “just busy that’s all. Me and Hannah, well... we’re gonna be seeing more of each other....” he lied again “she might not appreciate me spending time with ya” he felt bad making Hannah out to be the jealous type, lying about them courting. Hell, they hadn’t even been on one date yet.

“Oh I see” she answered quietly. “Well then, thank you for all you’ve done” she replied sadly. Turning to go Kid felt her sadness and it hurt him.

“Lou” his voice cracked with emotion.

She turned back to him expectantly.

He looked at her and realized he had to let it go like this. If he tried to smooth things over he’d just go back to going crazy again. No he’d have to leave things just like this.

“Never mind” his eyes traveled back to the ground and she again turned and walked away.

She was surprised at how incredibly hurt she was walking away from him, she realized she was losing a friend, but more than that she felt that familiar feeling of being squeezed to death. Since she had begun riding lessons with Kid that feeling had disappeared, even when she was with Stephen, her thoughts would wander to the last lesson, or the next and that feeling was tucked away somewhere. She didn’t care where it was, as long as it stayed hidden. But now, realizing the lessons were over, the feeling escaped it’s hiding place.

As she struggled she wondered whether it was only the riding lessons that she was going to miss.

But she already knew the answer to that, she had become acutely aware of her feelings for him. Especially after spending the day on the prairie.

She knew that he was much more that a friend....maybe it’s better this way, she thought, feeling tears well in her eyes.